As you all know, in My free recording Cocoon Submission I gave a post-hypnotic suggestion for My submissives (both men and women or anyone wanting to serve and submit to Me) to send Me compliments. But not just any compliment. I wanted to hear compliments I don’t hear very often. I mean, I hear things all the time like, “That recording was awesome, it was like you owned my soul!” or “That was sooo enchanting, I just want to serve you forever!” I mean… I hear that all the time. But I wanted to hear something I hadn’t heard before.

And sure enough, after releasing that recording, I received all sorts of compliments (many of them stuff I had heard before)… on Inraptured, in emails, in private messages, on MySpace… you name it. Even here on LiveJournal! But there were a few that *really* stood out to Me. These were ones that not only put a smile on My face, but really made Me think the person put thought into what they were writing. And I appreciated that very much, and for that, they have been very ((((obedient)))) submissives and they have made their Goddess proud.

MY FAVORITES:

***FAVORITE COMPLIMENT SO FAR***** I love you to pieces. I love you so much my nose bleeds. I hope deidre or someone else with a great ass makes you feel wonderful this week. I hope you smile until your jaws hurt.
———————–

Oh, to breath you in deeply and allow your essence to fill me. If only to allow me one more moment of life with which to adore you, And to whisper your name with my final breath. Oh that you would grant me one more breath. If that my existence would be this, oh sweet bliss.
———————–

If I ever wondered what velvet would sound like, I now know.
———————–

i am even more astounded at Goddess Isabella Valentine’s skill, command, and brilliance. She is astonishingly talented and brilliant, an Anna Netrebko or Daniele de Niese (gorgeous sopranos both) not of the operatic stage, but of the human heart and soul.
————————

Love
Isabella
xoxooxox

Click here for more info on Bella Luna and to hear a free sample

Love
Isabella
xooxoxoox

Remember the entry I posted here where I said a guy ran into me and recognized me???

Well I ran into him again last night at Uncle Elizabeth’s Bar. And it occured to me that I had gotten the situation all wrong. And now I feel sooooo much better because he’s not some creepy weirdo.

*Update* - I got this situation all wrong. Apparently I had ran into this guy at a bar at Uncle Elizabeth’s on New Year’s Eve and I was wearing my “Isabella Valentine wig” and I had told him what I did for a living and he has seen me a few times at the bar. The only reason he knew about my journal was because he had taken that small video clip of me from my cell phone (remember that cell phone video I posted from new years eve?) and I told him where I was going to post it. So thattttt’s where I ran into him. And THAT’S how he recognized me. And the Equinox - he has seen me drive it up to the bar a few times (recently). This is actually a HUGE sigh of relief. I don’t feel so creeped out now. ***

I posted this update in the old entry as well.

This makes me feel a LOT safer about posting pics of me without my wigs online. Because to tell you the truth, I was asking myself: what are the odds of someone recognizing me in Bloomington??? And what are the odds of them reading my journal? And what are the odds of them reading it every day enough to know I have an equinox and that I have OCD??? And I mean - what are the fucking odds????

So I feel SOOOO much better now. This guy only knows me cause I met him as *myself* on New Years Eve and just happened to be wearing a wig. And he knew what I did for a living cause I opened my mouth - hell, I don’t keep it a secret. So anyway. I’m not freaked out by the situation anymore.

Love
Isabella
xoxooxo

Just having fun with the camera, don’t mind me
Love
Isabella
xoxoox

Listen to the recording here

There are 2 versions of the recording - both of them are free (limited time)! Enjoy!

Love
Isabella
xoxoxox

So yesterday I got horrible, devastating news.

My brother, Abe, who is 28 and severely handicapped and brain damaged and lives in a group home… is getting kicked out in 30 days because my mother demanded a different doctor. And the group home is so stuck in their ways that they are unwilling to even TRY to see eye-to-eye with my mom even though they KNOW she is right on this because she’s been right on EVERYTHING before with him. Every time she points out something wrong, they don’t listen to her but she’s always right when it comes to medicines and stuff. This is terrible news because finding a place for him takes years and years. And my mother spent soooo long finding that place for him. And the doctor was terrible (they only have one doctor there that comes in - but there are lots of 24 hour care nurses and other people) and they refused to get second opinion for him. And since my mother apparently didn’t have “conservatorship” rights over him, no one would listen to her. They had put my brother on the wrong medication for years, which has made him sleep for most of the day and for years they gave him stuff for urinary tract infection which he didn’t even have! And only my mother (who lives in Orange County with him) is able to speak up for him since he can’t talk or walk and he can’t do anything for himself. It’s so unfair. And since she doesn’t have any rights, nothing is getting done. And now because the group home considers my mother a liable problem, they are going to get rid of my brother! He is getting terrible treatment. She can’t even get him out of there cause “she has no rights” and she can’t move him anywhere cause “she has no rights” and she can’t demand a new doctor to help him because “she has no rights” — she can’t do a damn thing. And because the group home considers her a threat and a hinderance and a possible liable problem, they are kicking my brother out (he is the one getting the worst of this and he’s the patient and it’s disgusting!) It’s horrible.

So I dug into my savings and wrote a check to her lawyer for a few thousand dollars for a lawyer for a retainer to get conservatorship rights over him, however if the group home decides to contest her… this could get nasty. This could go to court. And if that happens, her prepaid legal won’t cover it. The money I sent her will only get her temporary rights which lasts a few weeks and the group home can still run over her. Permanent conservatorship takes 3 months to get. This is terrible. I mean, I have money. But I don’t have that much money. Certainly not enough to cover lawyer fees to cover something like this for the length of time and the type of specialtists we will need.

My mother is currently trying to get the phone numbers and fax numbers of several news stations around the U.S. and is preparing press releases to try to make this a big deal to run her story. (When my mother gets mad, she goes to the press!) And since she has no money, she is hoping to get press coverage to scare off the group home from trying to contest her.

I really, truly hope that she doesn’t get contested cause my brother is getting the short end of the stick and he NEEDS another doctor. I have been doing everything I can for him financially this year, but without another doctor to get a second opinion - he’s just being treated poorly and I won’t stand for it. I feel hurt, disgusted, angry, pissed off, and I will do what it takes to support my mom. She and I have FINALLY been getting along for the last 5-6 months… and even though I can’t do much in California, I can at least try to help her get rights over him so she can demand a new doctor.

Anyway, sorry to ramble but I had to let it out
Love
Isabella
xoxooxox

So …. get THIS…. the guy from the jewelry store. The one who flirted with me a few days ago… I went back to see him (he wasn’t there but some female clerks were and they told me a little bit about the guy) - turns out… he’s married.

See. Just when I allowed my knees to buckle for a man.

He WAS cute, I’ll give him that. My pussy is so fucking tight right now and I haven’t been fucked with a real *man* penis in so long I can’t even remember when. Oh well. His loss.

I’m much better off sticking with girls *daydreams about deidre… again… for the millionth time*

Love
Isabella
xoxooxox

P.S. I masturbated in My bathtub this morning (took a looooong looooong bath) imagining slave deidre giving Me a bubble bath and I had commanded her to divert her eyes (like I did in the recording “Obey and Serve”) and she could only look at certain body parts as I commanded her. Then I made her shave my legs, shampoo my hair, massage my back, lather my body, fondle and suck on My nipples, and then I allowed her the privilege of opening her eyes and fingering My pussy like a good slave girl while still in the bathtub. I’m telling you, I came so hard. And afterwards, she toweled Me dry starting with My feet careful not to raise Her head because slaves must look at the floor and are not allowed to stare up at the Royal Goddess unless given permission (I’ve always found that erotic - knowing I’m naked and a slave can’t look unless I let them look - it’s like torture for them). And then with her hands, I made her lotion My legs and breasts and finally I tilted her chin to look up at Me and she had this beaaaaauuutifffulll look in her eyes. This look of love. This look of devotion. This look of worship and respect and admiration. I will never forget it. It made Me cum again and again and again. Just the look. Anyway. I can’t get her out of My head. What has she done to Me? How has a slave taken a hold of My head and conquered My brain like this?

Wow I love this new camera. Even better than the HD camera and it’s a downgrade! Wow. When I took pics with the HD, maybe 1 out of every 80 pics were usable (cause I’m so damn picky). But with this camera, I look and FEEL so hot in every picture I take. I am totally gonna use this camera ALL the time!!!

Love
Isabella
xoxoxoox

This entry is dedicated to those people who assume that being a Mistress or a Dominatrix means that you are not entitled to be “real” or have “human emotions” that allow you to be vulnerable.

Here is a journal entry I wrote on 10-11-2005

This is who I am and if you don’t like it, then go read someone else who fits into your “box.”

Love
Isabella
xoxoxoo

P.S. I not only gave the best presentation of my life, but the class got so into my speech and my props and my presentation, that I got a standing ovation and the teacher let me teach his class for the whole day. Even to this day, the students on campus talk about that day in that class. And other teachers talk about me to each other and now one of the teachers wants me to fly down to San Diego to be a guest speaker as a sex educator for her class for a day. Unfortunately, it’s not in my schedule. But as you can read in my initial entry - I was scared… shitless to go up in front of the classroom. I am human.

So um… for the record… when I was jewelry shopping… I kinda… sorta… met someone who…. um…. well…. how can I say this… Made me speechless… Made me sweat… Mutual flirtation…. wore diamond earrings in both ears (hot!)… and surprisingly… it was a guy. I wasn’t expecting that. In less than 15 minutes, my panties were soaked. And several hours later, I still can’t stop thinking about him. He was a hot black guy with dimples in his cheeks. He was totally flirting with me and I was trying on a Venetian glass necklace and matching earrings and he kept saying, “That’s as beautiful as you are.” And my panties kept getting wetter and wetter as he was saying it. I kept telling myself mentally (don’t let this guy get to you) — but even after I bought it, he was asking me where I like to hang out and stuff and it was obvious this guy really dug me and he was totally hitting on me. And to tell you the truth I was kinda doing it back. (Shit, lately I’ve mostly ignored guys when they’ve flirted with me, so this really surprised the hell outta me!!!)

Anyway when I turned to leave, I walked away confidently and didn’t turn back and made an extra effort to sway my ass a little bit. I could have *sworn* he was still staring at me. Now I wanna find an excuse to go back there. Question is… why can’t I get that way with girls? How come I stammer with women? But I can easily and confidently flirt with a hot and sexy man who is into me? This man totally wants me. And hell I’ll admit, the 5% heterosexual inside of me wants him too… but why oh why oh whhhyyyy can’t I get that way with women? Why is it so damn difficult for me to flirt with women when I’m sober? I get so fucking tongue tied. I spill all over myself. But with him it was so easy. I could *just tell* it was mutual. But with girls I’m a mess. **bangs head**

See if I were drunk off my ass, I could flirt with any woman I wanted to and I wouldn’t care what came out of my mouth. But the problem is - I get overly flirtatious, overly vulgar to the point of embarrassing them or saying something improper. I don’t want to do that anymore. I’m so over that. I mean *yeah* I want to do sexy naughty kinky things to them, but…. being sober and learning how to be *proper* is so fucking hard. I don’t know how to fucking do it. It’s killing me.

And I’m fucking horny.

And today meeting that guy…. shit… I wanted so bad to just get my pussy pounded!!!

Or maybe I just want to be pounded by a dildo and there’s no girl around and he just happens to be the next best option. I don’t know how to tell the difference at this point. I’m horny.

Goddamn.

This woman has upset me more in the last few minutes than I’ve been upset in the last few years.

I am beyond outraged. It’s people like that… that bring out all my hate and rage and make me want to hurt them. Seriously hurt them. I hope the courts throw the book at her.

And yet… there’s this small little part of me who feels a *drop* of compassion for her. I feel sorry for this woman. Her self-esteem must be so low that she doesn’t even care about her own 4-week old. She doesn’t have any care in the world. She doesn’t care about herself or anyone. And to feel that way, she has to be in the deepest of depressions and I can’t imagine what that must be like. She is devoid of love. She is devoid of humanity.

Regardless. She needs to be in prison. I hope the girls in prison beat her up good. And then… I hope someone shows mercy after her horrible beating and befriends her and shows her love so she’s not so depressed and she learns to love herself so she never does such an awful thing to anyone else (or to herself).

Love
Isabella
xoxoxoox